Even Though A StarKid Fanfiction with all the clichés
by inspiiration
Summary: Small town girl Carla thinks she's struck gold when none other than Joey Richter gives her his phone number, OMG WHAT WILL HAPPEN
1. Chapter 1

This fanfiction is based around ALL of the clichés that the StarKids are given in fics that I've read. Avoid at all costs. Even the title is a cliché. Shoutout to Sophie Ashworth for the insp.

My friends, Leanne and Becky and I laugh as the other speaks as we walk home from school.

"Hufflepuffs are particularly good finders!" I laugh. StarKid quotes were one of the few things that made us laugh.

"Carla, what the _hell _is a Hufflepuff?!" Leanne shouts. We all curl up into stitches of laughter! My blonde hair flows past my shoulders and whips back as I laugh. Suddenly, I realise the laughing has stopped and I'm the only one making any noise. I look behind me to see my friends have stopped walking several paces behind me and they're looking up at a figure that I obviously haven't seen yet. They've gone pale and they look as though they've seen a ghost.

Slowly, I turn back to face the front and I can hardly believe what my eyes are looking at; about 9 members from Team StarKid were walking up the pavement towards us! I was really surprised seeing as we were in England and there had been no rumour whatsoever that they were remotely near to the UK!

Immediately, my eyes lock onto the love of my life; Joseph Michael Richter. There are some fans that convince themselves that they are in love with their idols but they're wrong. I'm not like other girls. Joey _is _the love of my life. I can almost see that he feels the same when his eyes lock onto mine. As the group approaches nearer. Lauren jumps up onto Walker's back with a girlish scream and Walker sighs and rolls his eyes as he straightens his snapback that faces backwards.

Becky is the first one to speak up. "Oh, my God, it's Team St-" I immediately put my hand over her mouth and whisper in the ear of my small friend. "Be cool, okay?" She looks back at me and nods with wide eyes.

I walk up to Joey and wonder what I'm doing for a second. He's so beautiful with his crooked jaw and heavy stubble. His hair was windswept to one side and was only held still with the trademark blue headband that they apparently wore in public too. "Excuse me... you're... you're Joey Richter, right?!" I feel nervous but I hide it so fking good.

"Yeah," his voice was soft and nothing like it sounded on the videos. "Who might you be?" He cocked his eyebrow and smirked at me.

"I'm Carla. These are my friends, Leanne and Becky." He doesn't seem very interested in my friends and his eyes study my face.

"It's lovely to meet you." he replies quietly. A voice pitches in from amongst the group.

"Ooo, Joey likes her!" says Brian Holden before turning to Meredith and snogging her face off for no reason.

"Shut up!" says Joey, blushing. "So, you're a fan?"

"Yeah. I've been a fan since the very beginning. Even though I was only 11 and I didn't get any of the AVPM jokes, I loved you. I love what a tight bond you guys have. Do you all text each other StarKid quotes?" Okay, so, this was a slight hint that I wanted his number. You don't ask, you don't get, right?!

"Oh, yeah, Dylan refuses to face the fact he's not Dumbledore anymore."

"HEY. Ten points from Gryffindor, Richter." smiles Dylan.

"You can join in, if you like." I misunderstand what he means for a minute. I think he's joking because he winked at me. Then I realise he wanted... *gasp*... my phone number!?

"Do... do you want my phone number?" I ask shyly. He nods and I pull out my phone without thinking. I count my blessings as I give my phone number to the one man I've ever loved. For that moment, I was a mix of emotions. I was excited, nervous, anxious... would he ever call or text me? My friends kept making noises in the back that made me blush but they were jealous. They were jealous that I had Joey Richter's phone number and they didn't. I was the coolest girl in the whole wide world.


	2. Chapter 2

When I get home, I throw my bag into the corner of the room and ignore my parents' greetings. They were really getting on my nerves. The only refuge I had was StarKid... and Joey.

I run up to my room and jump on my bed, my hair flying behind me and sprawling out all prettily. I look at my iPhone to discover he's already texted me!

I read the words carefully.

"Hi Carla its Joey! Was gr8 meeting u 2day. Wanna come 2 a party Nick n Matts plc 2nite? x"

OH MY DEAD WIZARD GOD! HAD HE REALLY JUST INVITED ME TO A PARTY WITH THE STARKIDS? I decided to be cool and texted back slowly.

"hey joey. yeah, sure, dont think ive got anything planned so y not. lol... is it ok if i bring a friend x" My heart thumped as I pressed the send button and knew that I was talking to Joey Richter. I planned on bringing my friend Jessie who was obsessed with Joe Walker... she'd be so excited!

Almost immediately, he texted back with a charming tone, even in his writing.

"Yh, sure! As long as its not a bf ;) xx" That was his reply. I could have screamed... was he... flirting... with ME?

"cool. c u then." I jumped up and screamed, shaking my phone around in my hand. I scrolled through my contacts and called my friend Jessie.

"Jessie! Guess where we're going tonight?"

"Oh my god, where?" She replied, her posh voice travelling down the phone.

"Well. How would you react if I told you that I just hooked us up with Joey Richter and Joe Walker?" There was silence on the other end. I thought she'd died. Suddenly, a high-pitched screeched echoed around my room that came from my phone. "Be at mine in ten minutes, we'll get ready together!" I hung up the phone and sat down at my mirror and turned on my hair straighteners, imagining what tonight would hold.


	3. Chapter 3

Sophie wrote most of this chapter, I edited the names but all the content is perfect and made me pee a little bit with laughter, shoutout to ma home gurl

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I couldn't believe we were going to a StarKid party! Jessie drove us there. She was also a huge Team StarKid fan!  
"OMG I CAN'T BELIEVE WE'RE GONNA MEET THE STARKIDS" she squealed.  
"YEA XD" I yelled, turning on my Space Tour album. We sang along to the angelic voices. I had a horrible voice but Jessie was brilliant. I thought that if we got there, Joey might like her instead of me and a silent tear rolled down my face.

"Hello Ladies!" Brian said as we walked inside despite him not knowing who we were. He held a redbull in his hand as he wore underwear. "May I ask who you are?"

"OH MY GOD BRIAN STOP HITTING ON ME" I screamed, despite him only asking my name. We went inside and saw him... Joey.

I started to walk towards him, but a body came into my path.

"Hey." said Joe Walker flirtily.

"Hi. I'm trying to go see Joey." I muttered. Jessie might like Walker but I could tell he was nothing but a sex-crazed lunatic with an ego bigger than his dick who wanted nothing but to fuck me, despite him saying a word to me.

"Sorry, I wasn't talking to you?" he said, confused, as if he just noticed I was there. "I was talking to this girl, what was your name?"

"Jessie!" she squeaked. They walked off to talk, and I rolled my eyes. Obviously he hit on her instead of me, no one ever liked me!

"Uhhh, Carla?" Joey said. I started crying.

"Hey hey hey, what's wrong?" He asked, his voice filled with concern and his pupil's large with worry.

"Everyone always likes Jessie more than me! It's not fair!" I sobbed. He pulled me into his arms.

"Shhhhhh.." he soothed, "You know who doesn't like Jessie more than you? he asked, pushing me slightly so I was looking into his chocolate coloured orbs. I shrugged, furrowing my brows in confusion.

"Me."

Then he crashed his lips into mine, kissing me softly. He tried to deepen the kiss, his tongue begging for entrance. We shoved our tongues down eachother's throats in a show of our love. Our tongues battled for dominance. We pulled away after about 5 minutes. EVERYONE cheered.

"I love you." He whispered under his breath, hoping I wouldn't hear since we weren't actually dating.

"I love you too." I said shyly. He grinned, and kissed me again.


	4. Chapter 4

Soph also wrote this chapter because she writes better than me and I'm a lazy little shit SO YEAH ENJOY

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Carla woke up the next day in a bed that wasn't hers. She screamed.

"SHUT THE FUCK UP." Lauren screamed from the next room.

"DON'T BE MEAN LO." Brosenthal called with his shy voice. I had never watched a Tin Can Bros. video in my life. Brian had hooked up with some girl last night too... I remembered meeting her... what was her name? Lulu?

"SORRY, SOMEONE SCREAMED." Lauren replied.

"SORRY I DIDN'T KNOW WHERE I WAS." Carla yelled. The StarKid's were weird.

"Morning, sunshine!" Joey sang, skipping into the room. Then he gasped. Carla looked down. She was naked, and Joey had just seen her boobs!

"WHY AM I NAKED?" She yelled.

"Hell if I know!" Joey yelled back., anger lacing his voice. "You were in Meredith's spare pyjama's when I tucked you in!

Carla hung her head. She barely remembered anything. She took a drink of water and saw her bra on the ground. She gasped, suddenly remembering the events of last night, after Joey kissed her.

*Magical Flashback in Cara's POV!* (Lol geddit liek in avpsy lol lol"

_"Do you want a drink?" Joey said after he kissed me for the second time, grabbing two beers from that author guy. I thanked him, necking it in 5 seconds. I felt myself getting light headed. _

_"So, uhh... are we dating now?" I asked, flicking my dirty-blonde hair over my shoulder. _

_"If you want to." Joey smiled shyly, staring into my turquoise eyes. I nodded._

_"I'm gonna get another drink." I murmured, getting up and stalking off to where author-guy was being the 'Bartender' _

_"Gimme a drink, author-man." I said, snatching it away from him. _

_"Author man? I thought Joey said you were a fan, don't you know who I am?" He sounded hurt, but I didn't care._

_"You're... Liam White?" I asked._

_"OH MY GOD. NO. I'M ERI-"_

_I slapped him for yelling at me and then drank. I noticed Jessie and Walker making out in the corner. Yuck. They literally just met, why are they making out? Then I remembered... I literally just kissed Joey. _

_I left as they started dry-humping, but through the storm of grinding couples I couldn't find Joey. I was so drunk and the manor so huge, and all my otp's were canon!1! :D_

_I drank and drank and drank. Eventually Joey found me and gave me some of Meredith's pyjama's to change into, and tucked me into the guest room. I lay in bed, too drunk to sleep. About 3 hours later, the entire house was silent. My door creaked open, and a head popped in._

_"Hey." said Joe Walker. He came over to me and we started kissing passionately for some reason. I forgot all about Joey as he undressed me. *SMUT WARNING* Then he put his thingie in my you-know-what and we did it for the first time. (thnx to My Immortal for the sex ed.) *SMUT OVER*_

_eventually, I pushed him off. We were both drunk, but I remembered about Joey and Jessie. They were both going to hate me!_

_He smirked and left. I cried._

*flashback over*

"Carla... Carla... Carla..." Joey kept repeating.

"WHAT?" I snapped.

"You've been in a trance for like 5 minutes. What's wrong? Why are you, y'know, naked?" He blushed.

"I..." I... I slept with Walker."

"WHAT?!" Joey yelled, despite Lauren's screams of how she needed beauty sleep.

"I'm sorry!" I pleaded. He said nothing, storming out of the room. I cried as I heard him start his car and drive away.

"YOU BITCH!" Jessie screams. Great. I'd lost my best friend AND my boyfriend. There was only one thing left to do.

Kill everyone in Team StarKid.


	5. Chapter 5

Sophie wrote this chapter again!

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I had to start planning their deaths. Firstly, I had to get them all in one place. Except for Joey, Joe, and Jessie. For them, I had other plans.

First, I walked into Lauren's room. After getting dressed, of course!

"Hey Lauren! Do you wanna go out?" I said sweetly, hitting her over the head with a baseball bat. She slumped, and I laughed manically, shoving her into the boot of my car. I drove to the Grand Canyon, since I have no geographical knowledge, and threw her over the edge. 1 down, many more to go. I texted some other's from Lauren's phone.

From: Lauren Lopez!  
To: Julia Albain, Jaime Lyn Beatty, Rachel Soglin, Denise Donovan, Devin Lytle, Sango Tajima, Alex Paul, Lily Marks, Ali Gordon, Alle-Faye Monka.

"Hey guys! Having a party at the Grand Canyon. C u there!"

I waited for them to arrive. 5 minutes later, I saw them.

"Who are you?" Devin said curiously with her annoying Southern accent.

"I'M CARLA!" I squealed. That bitch.

"Where's Lauren?" Julia muttered, cuddling Ali like she was a baby. "She's so childish, I bet she fell over the edge." Julia was such a mother. I grinned evilly, and pressed a button on Lauren's hacked phone. The traps I had previously set up sprang into place, capturing them. Damn, I was so good at techy stuff.

"WHAT THE FUCK." Denise yelled. I smirked as I pushed them into the canyon, then started messaging the others.

From: Lauren Lopez!  
To: *pretend i wrote out all their names*

Once they got here, I pushed them over the edge too. This was too easy.

Now I was up to the final stage of my plan...

From: Lauren Lopez!  
T: Joey Richter, Joe Walker, Jessie Criss,

Hey guys, it's Lauren. Duh! meet me at Joey's place in an hour.

After I sent the message, I gasped. It occured to me I'd never known Jessie's last name. She was Darren Criss's sister?!

Ah well. It didn't matter, Darren was dead and so would she be, soon.

My plan was coming together perfectly.


	6. Chapter 6

I wrote this chapter:))))

OOO DERRRS A PLOT TWEST IN DIS CHAPTDURRR

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I drove back to Joey's place in the rain, my Space Tour album blasting throughout the car. When I pulled up, I saw two cars there already. I knew one of them was Joey's and I was in Jessie's car so she must have come with Joe.

Pffft. Typical Jessie. What a slut. Obviously, she didn't care about what he did to me. I hated them both.

When I walked into the house, all 3 of them turned to look at me. Without a word, I locked the door behind me.

"What are _you _doing here?" Joey asked looking really upset. He looked like he was ill.

"Please hear me out." I said shyly. I was totally cunning. I'd totes be in Slytherin. I walked into the kitchen where they were all sat and I smiled sadly. "I'm... really so-"

"Save it, Carla." Jessie said. My blood boiled and steam could have been coming from my ears. I sighed.

"This could take a while. I'll make us some drinks." I put a selection of strange liquids in the glasses. I didn't care what was in them. It's not like they'd be ill for very soon. I pulled the pills out of my pocket and crushed them between my finger and thumb before dropping the powder into 3 of the 4 glasses. I knew which glass was mine because I just had water. I passed out the glasses and watched with dark eyes as they all took a sip.

Within ten minutes, they were passed out and I tied them to chairs. When they woke up, they found themselves in a dark room.

"Wh... Whuh?" Joe was the first to wake up. "Jessie?! JESSIE?!

"Joe! I'm here!" she cried.

"Guys, what's going on?" Joey mumbled. "Where's Carla?"

"I'm here, baby." I said softly, switching on the light and leaning against the doorframe. We were in Joey's cellar because apparently whenever StarKids gets kidnapped they end up in cellars.

"WHAT is going on?" shouted Joe. I threw a dagger and it landed in his neck. He was dead. Jessie screamed and Joey began to cry. I flipped Lauren's phone out of my pocket and held it in my hand.

"It was nice of Lauren to lend me her phone... not like she had much choice though."

"Where are they all?" Shouted Joey.

"Let's just say, they took a tumble down the Grand Canyon. Jessie's scream was cut off when her head was sliced off her shoulders by my badass fking sword.

"You broke my heart, Joey. Now you'll pay the price." I walked towards him slowly with a knife.

"Carla... Carla! CARLA!"

I opened my eyes to find myself in a strangely familiar room. I rolled over and looked at the guy who looked down at me. It was my husband, Joey Richter. Thank Dead Wizard God it was just a dream.

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And thus ends my fucky fanfic. Thanks for reading!


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